Project 365: Day 68 - Family Portraits....

I picked my children up from school today and they both wanted to take me to their art wall. There were masterpieces I just had to see! Big E's was, of course, super hero related. He had a portrait of each of us and he said we were all heros and we had to fight the rain that was coming down on our heads. Cute.

Peanut had a more subdued family portrait. House in the middle. Mama and Daddy on one side of the house and Peanut and his brother on the other. There was rain in this photo too, drawn creatively by a single horizontal line straight across the top and then various vertical lines, much smaller, pouring from that longer line. I thought it was interesting. But more interesting, was the fact that Peanut drew me "big hair". And he was proud of the fact that he gave me said big hair. I asked why and his answer was quite simply: You have big hair Mama.

68 of 365: Really???.....

Good Night All!

Project 365: Day 67 - What do You Want to be When You Grow Up??....

Do you ever wonder what your kids will be like as adults? I have had the same image in my mind for the past few years. You already know that my twin boys are as opposite as humanly possible. I don't foresee much changing as they grow into men.

My image of their adulthood is quite specific. Because of his need to be well-dressed and his meticulous nature, Big E will most likely hold some corporate position, finance in nature and carry around a laptop (or whatever they may have in 20 or so years). It will either be that or, because of his love of costumes and music, a spot on Broadway. Either of which he will be tremendously successful. Peanut, on the other hand, will be a Matthew McConaughey type, rugged good looks, usually topless, working in some beach dive possibly in Hawaii or at least Panama City Beach Florida. He will not run the rat race and he will exude a coolness about himself that everyone will envy. He will not care about being successful.

Check back with me in twenty years and let's see how close I got.

Hell, I still have the same grown-up image of myself I've had since I was 8 and her name is Stevie Nicks. Still waiting on that......

67 of 365: Very rare Self Portrait....

Good Night All!

Project 365: Day 66 - Differences.....

Big E is in hog heaven now that the cooler weather is here. I've already described his borderline addiction to costumes. When he's not decked out in Spiderman or Robin, he is sure to have his say on his attire. Layers, layers, layers. He's been that way for as long as I can remember. As soon as he discovered he had opinions, I was no longer in charge of what he would wear. The only time I'm ever lucky enough to have control of this little piece of his life is when we have somewhere special we have to go or it's picture day at school. I guess I could just lie and then he would wear what I wanted everyday. Ah, but then I would have to come up with even more lies about why that party got cancelled or how the photographer came down with the flu.

I don't mind it too much, except when what he wants to wear looks absolutely hideous. I've learned over time to shop around his opinions. As long as it doesn't involve blue jeans or button down shirts, I'm usually in the clear. And believe it or not, it IS possible to find cute outfits that don't involve either. And if "track suit" is any where in the description, I golden! I don't love track suits, but it does make me happy that he knows what he likes and he cares about how he dresses. I wonder how much I'm going to like it when he gets even older and his taste gets more expensive? I should probably go ahead and start a "Big E's Wardrobe" savings account.

Or I actually could use the money that I save on Peanut to go towards Big E. That child prefers less clothing. When they were babies, he usually just wore a diaper. And now he's in this only pajama bottoms to bed kick. I think it's cute, but he may realize that's not the best option with this colder weather coming.

I still marvel at their differences. It is truly hard to believe that they are twins most of the time. And, because of their size, I really get some funny looks when people ask how far apart they are in age and I reply "2 minutes." But their differences are a blessing. They are polar opposites and I hope that creates a strong bond as they grow older. Opposites attract, right? Well, let's just hope they don't distance themselves over time because they have nothing in common. Either way, I wouldn't change either one of them for the world. I love that they have different views of the world and I love being able to watch them experience those differences.

65 of 365: The Peanut Man...

Good Night All!

Project 365: Day 65 - Dating????......

When you've been emotionally separated from your husband for several years and physically moved out for over nine months, you begin to wonder "when is the right time to start thinking about dating again" I haven't quite figured out the answer to that question yet. I mean technically, can I really date yet? I mean I'm still married. At least in the government's eyes I am. And what kind of problem would that cause? Would he be upset? Would he even care? Would it bother me if he didn't care? And then what about the boys? Would they understand? Would they even notice? Could they accept this new person openly? And, of course, what about the poor sap that wanted to date me? Would he accept not being number one in my eyes? Would he be gracious in patience and give me the space I may need from time to time? Does he understand what I'm going through? i mean really understand? Does he have kids of his own? Does he come with a lunatic ex "other half?" And finally, what about me? Am I ready for this? Could I possibly learn how to go backwards? Would I ever feel comfortable enough to introduce him to my children? Would I ever feel comfortable with him period?

And thats only a fraction of the 673 questions I actually have. How the hell am I going to be able to answer all of them? I guess the bigger question is........ Is it worth it?

You bet your ass is it.

Life is too short to limit love.

Good Night All!

Project 365: Day 64: A Peanut Skeleton.....

It is characters night. My weekly entry of love in disguise. Tonight is brought to you courtesy of Peanut. The costume is not too far from the truth. I keep telling him he's skin and bones. The child is the pickiest eater I know. And that's saying a lot coming from me. At least I know where he gets it.

64 of 365: Peanut.... You need to eat more food honey.......

Good Night All!

Project 365: Day 63 - Girls' Night......

Starting a new job is always scary. You're the new kid on the block and it can be difficult to start feeling like you're part of the team. It can be even more difficult getting close to anyone you work with. At least close enough to go out and have drinks with. I consider myself a fairly outgoing person, but I still shy away from certain situations. That is until one person from work invited me out for a girls' night. So tonight was my exception.

There are so many great people at my new office. And with it, new opportunities to create new friendships. If I'm being honest, it's one of the reasons I chose to move on in my career in the first place. I knew that it was time for me to expand my horizons and discover relationships that I was not able to in my old job. I have several wonderful friends already, but logistics and distance prevent me from seeing them as often I would like. So the opportunity to go out with some new friends was something I could not pass up. I need the girl time and after nine months in this new town, I was well past due.

So I was invited out tonight for a much needed drink. Two great women from my office, one a semi-single mom and the other a single non-mom, and myself met for wine and great conversation. I'm the oldest of us three, but that didn't matter (although I seem to keep making a deal of it....... whatever.) We talked of relationships and lack thereof. We drank a few bottles of wine (over the whole course of the evening) and ordered the most fattening appetizers on the menu. It was nice enjoying the cool air on the patio of the bar and making plans for our next outings: slumber party, karaoke, and morning after brunch.

After marathon rounds of Star Wars and refereeing of my boys, the wine tasted great. I hope that we keep our plans of hanging out again. I really need to freshen up on my singing abilities.

63 of 365: Thanks ladies for a great evening. (I didn't get permission to use their picture in my blog, but something tells me they won't mind.)

Good Night All!

Project 365: Day 62 - Treasures......

Tonight was haircut night for the boys. And yes,, that's one thing I will spend money on in the grooming department. When the boys were younger, we could get away with a buzz cut in the bathroom. But not now. Big E has tremendously think hair with no less than 6 cowlicks. Peanut, on the other hand, has baby fine hair like his mama. I can cut my own hair because it's outrageously curly and if I make a mistake, who's gonna notice? But their hair takes an actual professional.

Great Clips is usually the salon of choice, but I thought we would try something different tonight. There is this super cute children's salon across the street from our place called "Crew Cuts and Pig Tails." The seats are taxi cabs and airplanes. They have a flat screen television between each chair. Tonight's showing was Madagascar. There are specialty toys all around. And child specific hair products (which I wouldn't dare pay the astronomical dollars they were asking for.) But the place was cute and the boys really liked it.

Once the hair cut was complete, they got two rewards: a lollipop and one item of choice from the big treasure chest by the front door. Both boys picked a blue lollipop, which they have always done for as long as I can remember. Then they both raced over to the treasure chest, which was filled to the rim of various toys I would never call crap in front of the boys. But crap it was. I stood back and watched as they marveled over bouncey balls and tattoos, plastic animals and stickers. Once they had finally made their choice, they both walked over to me and held out their hands to show me what they had picked. As each tiny hand flipped over and all tiny fingers opened up, I was taken back to see that they both picked out a ring for me.

62 of 365: Crap I will forever treasure.

Good Night All!