Sunday, November 15, 2009

The next step.....

So, in my journey towards single-motherhood, many decisions have to be made. And one thing that people have a hard time understanding is that I am involving the STBE in most of them. It is important to me that we maintain civility during a trying time for both of us. It is amazing to me that people expect there to be so much anger and hostility and negativity. As you most of you know, negativity is not part of my make-up.

But it is easier for people to accept the idea of "being mad" rather than "being happy." We both want to be happy and it is not possible to accomplish that with anger. So we do what we need to do to make it a positive environment for our children. This is going to affect them regardless. Why influence that affect with anything less than "positive" images in a sad situation. Therefore, he has been a part of this "new home" decision. He joined me and my agent when we went to look at it. He helped me weigh options regarding one place over another. And ultimately, he will move to the general area to be close to his children. And I want him close to his children. He deserves to be as big a part of their lives as I do.

So we are now at the point of my moving out. I found a house, which I am truly excited about. Gut-wrenchingly scared to death about, but excited none the less. Fear will be a natural re-occurrence during this most significant transition. But I will conquer it like anything else. One day at a time.

Many people in my life have mixed emotions about this move and I don't blame them. They, too, are scared for me. But if they know anything about me, they know I will look this challenge in the face with an arrogant stance and flip it the bird.

Happy Living All!