Thursday, September 16, 2010

Project 365: Day 47 - In Training........

I originally started blogging because I wanted to journal my transformation from being a mom with twins to being a triathlete mom with twins. I had fun with the experience, balancing my extensive training with raising toddlers. I didn't set out to help anyone. I just wanted a method of conveying my journey, a transformation diary if you will. And I enjoy going back from time to time and reading my stories of " what the hell'" and "have I lost my mind". And then I enjoy reading about the end of my journey, of finally becoming a triathlete. I ended up completing two within a few months of each other. Crossing the finish line both times was amazing. It was exhilarating and indescribable. It was almost a feeling of peace. For many months I had trained and conditioned myself to overcome the pain I felt when I didn't think I could do it anymore. I learned how to pace myself and turn to certain forms of energy just when I needed them, I rejoiced in the small accomplishments of cresting a mountain and I allowed myself small levels of defeat just so that I could appreciate the win even more when the battle was over.

I look back at this time in my life and I realize that I wasn't just training for a triathlon. I was preparing for the battle, for the trials I will face everyday as a single parent. I am learning to pace myself through the emotions of separation. I am conditioning myself to be able to quickly overcome the pain when I think I can't do it anymore. This separation is my small piece of defeat so that I can understand that this is a means to an end. This battle I will win. This battle I have already won. I am rejoicing.

After I realized I was to become a single mom, I decided to move my blog in a new direction: Journaling my transformation into a single mom of twins. Looking back, not much has changed. I'm still in training.

47 of 365: A shot of me and my boys after completing my first triathlon.

Good Night All!


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